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[08 May 2009|08:30am] |
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heartache.
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[06 May 2009|09:02am] |
taken by complete and utter surprise.
fall in love just to get knocked down.
at this point..
i dont know which is harder.
a. staying best friends with the person that "isnt in love with you anymore" after 2 years.
b. shutting out your best friend who "isnt in love with you anymore" after 2 years.
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[16 Sep 2007|08:17pm] |
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mood |
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 happy |
] |
Random ass weekend.
Turning into some of my favorite memories.
Long Island.
New Jersey.
Philly.
Mis Sigs
Agony Scene
Emmure
The people who compose these bands are my new FAVORITE people.
Soooo much love.
Lex.. I louvre you. thank you again.
And Jess! Youre the bomb diggs chica!!!
all i gotta say is "we're boyfriend"
AND.. Just Sweep It...Just Sweep It.
ANDDDD Thank You.
It's going to be a long fuckin month and a half.
To be totally lame for a second.
I miss this kid already.
Blarg.
::allll smiles::
<333333
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| best friends means: |
[02 Jul 2007|10:04pm] |
You are a liar.
a cheat.
unloyal.
manipulative.
COWARD.
and a terrible excuse for a christian.
you pride yourself on your beliefs and your "friendships"
but honey, friendship goes hand in hand with selflessness.
And THAT is a quality you do NOT possess.
Go ahead.
Hide.
Pretend like youve done nothing wrong.
But remember the only person that matters is watching your every move.
All in all is in the past.
But what goes around....
comes the fuck around twice fold.
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[20 Jun 2007|05:29pm] |
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she doesnt give a damn.
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| i keep deleting this. but i want to post it somewhere. |
[15 Jun 2007|11:43am] |
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man up.
i'd probably float
at least the sharks have my back.
but would you glance twice.
with patchwork carelessly stitched.
i am drifting off
not without the breeze of your breath
you've erased my name.
my face.
my kiss.
my calls.
but darling dont forget this.
ive been choking on my words.
trying to get to a point.
but you were the lucky one.
my named rolled off your lips.
run in circles,
trip the girl,
shes fallen hard.
you asked her to.
she'll never see this coming.
flee the scene.
this is where it gets tricky.
you offered friendship
but whats happened to you
has left that word a shell.
Bear,
If you want me to think less of you
keep your actions where theyre heading.
dont worry
i'm really not all hurt.
onward, progress is the new name of the game.
and i'm advancing just fine.
this towels been thrown in
the damage is done.
but i swear if you make another promise
that you'll never keep.
i dont know if i'll be able to retain
the want to slit your throat.
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| accepting that its really over. |
[11 Jun 2007|07:11pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 disappointed |
] |
me: its raining, do you still have my umbrella?
bobby: yeah i used it the last storm we had...... didn't really provide cover
bobby: so i'm going to give it back
bobby: in exchange for gym shorts and contact solution
the REAL means to an end.
the exchange.
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[08 Jun 2007|11:40pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 pissed off |
] |
i am disgusted.
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[22 May 2007|12:21am] |
Bobby: i was trying to write that "i love you"
: and everything was getting scrambled
: all i could think was
: "you're not going to stop me from telling her "i love you"
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| this is long. and my face hurts. |
[03 May 2007|11:07pm] |
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he said we're going on an adventure.
and at first i wasnt a believer.
woo i love the summer
and central park.
and spending my time with people i love.
<3
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| CLICK IT SUKKUHS! |
[30 Apr 2007|01:23pm] |
| [ |
music |
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cursive-proposals |
] |
this is the link to my Senior Show at FIT.
this is all of the illustration pieces that are going in!
mine are towards the end.
so are bobby's.
CHECK IT OUT.
and if you want to see it in person thenn...
may 8th to the 23rd go to the Museum at FIT otherwise known as the E building.
at 27th street and 7th avenue.
obviously i'd like to think you'd call me if youre going to come.
opening night is gonna be a big deal so i'll post details on that soon.
and it would be amazing to see some people in support of what i do.
<3
http://www3.fitnyc.edu/illustration/seniorshow2007/
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| "yo, that guy wants sunchips." |
[29 Apr 2007|10:55pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 chipper |
] |
last night was fucking awesome.
lex sarah and i went to beauty bar.
sarah left early, so lex and i got some good ole girlfriend drunkie time in.
it was WELL deserved and much needed.
its nights like these that everything just makes sense.
Best Friends Are For Knife Fights.
so needless to say.. we got hammered.
or at least i got hammered and lex got drunk. haha.
we met a really sweet barback who took a liking to the trouble lex and i were causing.
we participated in a dance party.
and then decided i should prolly stop drinking.
i yelled at a bunch of people on the street just because i wanted to be loud and obnoxious.
and i drunk dialed some people.
and i laughed uncontrollably for quite a while.
and then we headed for home.
took the N which meant i had to walk the 12 blocks up to my apt in heels. grr.
but i was numb at this point so whatever.
ended up walking right past bobby and mike and not realising it till he called and was like "hey i'm at this block" and me being like "hey im at this block.. HOW DID I MISS YOU GUYS"
anyways. we got to my apt. and the boys ate their egg sandwiches.
and were quite adorable about it.
bobby and i wrestled for a while then fell asleep because as i said before i was quite hammered.
woke up and wrestled some more till meg joined us in bed until i kicked her out.
mike overslept and went to work a good 8 hours after he was supposed to be there.
which gave us time to have a kickass convo about love and life on the way to our jobs.
started day 1 of detox. which at this point has been a success except for how bad i was craving something fatty and delicious after a night full of boozing.
bought detox tea which is delish minus the pepper taste.
and ate cucumbers all day at work.
now i'm home
doing homework.
and slowly starting to remember silly stuff that i did last night on the streets of new york.
"YOU BITCH"
anyways.
that has been my last 24 hours.
and i am completely smitten about it all.
and..i dont know how or why or when it happened but. i <3 him.
actually. i know exactly how. and why. and when.
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[28 Apr 2007|07:20pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 content |
] |
| [ |
music |
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sleepy hollow |
] |
few things...
1.alex, sarah and i start our 7-9 day detox program tomorrow.
i'm quite excited to be "clean"
i sound like an addict.
awesome.
2.school is SOOO close to being over.
but my parents might not be able to come to graduation.
and i'm REALLY bummed about this.
because there really isnt any reason to go to graduation now.
3.half my store got laid off because of cutbacks.
and i got more hours.
how? why? what? SCORE!
4.i still dont have text messaging.
and i'm still dying without it.
DAMNIT DAD!
5.like you didnt see this one coming..
Bobby is..well.. amazing.
came home from work today to my bed made and a heart on my pillow.
fucking nauseatingly adorable.
thats all that i can think of thats new right now.
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| And all we have left are memories. |
[16 Apr 2007|10:30am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 indescribable |
] |
| [ |
music |
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bright eyes. |
] |
i feel like i'm floating right now.
like i'm stuck in the middle of nowhere.
and need someone to throw me up some rocks to weigh me back down to earth.
my dad's phone call at 8 am this morning was one filled with the biggest mix of emotions to date.
he was cheerful.
but sad inside.
a sad that makes your voice crack even through attempts to be cheerful.
a cheerful only to comfort your daughter.
and make sure she knows or at least thinks her father is the strongest man in the world.
the doctors say its my grandfathers final hours.
he's off life support.
in wishes to die naturally.
i dont know how to comprehend/deal with this.
i was lucky enough to see him last week in Florida.
when his health was seemingly doing better than prior days.
and he said goodbye.
and i said goodbye.
I love you Grampaa.
<3
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| dustin said it best.... |
[24 Mar 2007|12:39am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 sore |
] |
| [ |
music |
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dusty babe |
] |
All i can say is
I knew you before
you were beautiful back then
before you grew up
before you gave in
you dream of sharing your heart
instead you share your bed
youre heart beats empty and cold
from all the tears you have shed
you dream of bearing your soul
instead you bare more skin
you wear dark glasses
to keep anyone from looking in
and all i can say is
i knew you before
you were beatiful back then
you could be beautiful again.
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[19 Mar 2007|12:32pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 dirty |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Charles Ives |
] |
FrozFruit Bananas & cream is my favorite thing on earth right now.
if you bought me a box i wouldnt be opposed to loving you all night long.
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[14 Mar 2007|01:15am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 crazy |
] |
oh yeah..
Roy and I got arrested last night!!!
it was awesome!!
no really.
it was.
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[14 Mar 2007|01:09am] |
I am afraid:
I will never resurface to catch a breath.
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michabelle's journal
